Bubba, McRib and Me

When I was eight years old, I consumed thirty-two McRib sandwiches in the month of March.  To put that in perspective, I weighed 94 pounds at the time.  As a McRib weighs approximately a pound with all the fixin's, in one month I basically ate a third of my weight in McRibs.  You could say I was a big fan.

The (rib flavored) apple of my eye.

Thankfully for my cardiovascular system, the McRib disappeared from the McDonald's menu for several years, only to reappear on a monumental day in my life.

I was in the sixth grade when President Bill Clinton came to Atlanta to speak at the CNN center.  My school took a field trip to see the speech, taking off in the late morning so that we could arrive for the 1 PM event.  We parked the bus right outside the food court and sat on the ground in the cool October air to enjoy our bagged lunches the school provided.  If you've ever been subjected to a school-made bagged lunch, I don't have to tell you that the granola bar was the only edible item in the bag.

Famished after the meager meal, I walked in our alphabetically organized single file line into the CNN Center to see the President.  As we passed by the McDonald's in the food court, I saw a poster with three words that made my heart stop.  It's Back! McRib.

After three years of waiting and wondering, my sandwich had returned.  Had I read Love in the Time of Cholera at age eleven, I would have compared my longing to that of Florentino Ariza.  Suffice to say, I would have waited a lifetime for one bite.

President Clinton spoke for about 45 minutes.  I paid attention for exactly none.  All I could think about was when I could get my hands on that boneless pork patty, barbecue sauce, onions and pickles served on a 6 inch (15.2 cm) roll.

When the speech concluded, the President made his way towards our group, going into the crowd to shake hands.  This indeed was enough to get my attention and I extended my arm when he was a few feet away.  He grabbed my hand and gave it a vigorous shake.  It was everything you'd expect out of a handshake from the most powerful man in the world.  I was incredibly excited.  My friends were all quite jealous as I was the only one in our group who had the honor.

I returned home from school that day beaming with the events of the day.  I bust through the door and ran up to my mother.  I could still feel the grip of the President on my young hand.

"Mom," I exclaimed. "Guess what!"  

"What sweetie?" She replied.

"McRib is back!"